“well hello there fine fellows and good day to you. yes, i was wondering if the use of this fine basketball court (taps court with cane) might be free for me and my colleagues to use this afternoon. you see we were developing quite the case of cabin feevah and were wondering if we might use this facility to alleviate some of it. with a little sport you see. all in good fun. what do you say?”
feel free to write your own ending here.
thought i’d post this photo of shaun white at the 2010 winter olympics in his all american snowboarding gear due to my other recent post about PajamaJeans. jeans that are not jeans are apparently becoming a trend. but in this case, i rather like the fake jeans. yay? nay?
as if there were a #2. and the theme song leaves something to be desired. but i’ll tell you what, i’ve got a cupboard full of cookie cutters that don’t even have theme songs. what my other cookie cutters do have going for them, however, are full-bodied symmetrical outlines which prevent burnt little arms and legs from ruining all the hard work you just spent making fetus cookies. maybe the woman making the cookies was in her late 30s or early 40s. maybe that’s why she burnt them and messed them all up.
voodoo doll shoes. whoever you choose for the shoe doll to represent can be put through various forms of torture through simple witchcraft. you could stand across the room from an evil coworker, all the while stomping your feet like a two year old having a fit. soon they will have to take their lunch early to grab some ibuprofen. fool!
you could also totally go to the movies and turn the shoes around so they couldn’t see the screen. wouldn’t that be maddening. stupid proxy. whatever that proxy did to you i bet it was so not worth it now. i bet that proxy is like, “so regretting duping whoever into THAT. i won’t be deluding anyone else any time soon. oh no i won’t. do i smell like dog shit?” of course, i suppose someone who’s not physically present at a theatre wouldn’t be bothered by not being able to see the screen. hmm…. well, i’m sure it translates into something truly awful in voodoo for your hated coworker. like having an unreachable itch with no long objects around, forcing one to blackbear it on a weight bearing beam in the center of the office.
and the winner is……………
paris hilton. this was not a halloween costume, repeat, this was not a halloween costume. but to support the guesses, she does have long thin legs and size 11 feet, making her lower body structure look much like a man’s.
spats? who’s thats?
because it’s so difficult to actually put socks on. and also because red mary janes shoes really go with tall basketball socks. because those items should be paired together. i know. let’s make it permanent. and rubber.
(shoe suggestion by beth ramsey anderson)
…as an avatar. or mystique from x-men. i can’t figure it out. at any rate i was at another photoshoot by the GORGEOUS betsy mcleod. my makeup was done by the AMAZING david anthony paul thibodeau. these are just photos taken once i got home. the real photos will be available to me in a couple weeks probly. i’ll post them. liquid’s spilling out my mouth in the real ones. you’ll see.
first a lil’ fashion. this shoe is a part of nicholas kirkwood’s spring 2010 lineup. kirkwood is infamous for making some wild and crazy shoes (cousin (sh)it), and i definitely make an effort to check out his lineups each and every season. he strongly favors this specific type of platform which always appears somewhat nebulus to the rest of the shoe. now for some clownin’. they look like you could pop them right off and find a secret key or some emergency chocolate in there. not to mention the fact that you could use both the heel and the heel cup as separate and frankly, very complimentary weapons. for both of those reasons, airports love these shoes. big fans. such big fans the security guards might want to pull you aside and ask you a few questions about them. the heel appears a bit like a jenga game. maybe it is a jenga game. jenga the footwear edition. how far can you walk in these before you just come toppling down? imagining the runway lined with families dressed like they’re from the 1990s instead of snooty fashion officials just cheering those bitches on. “come on sweetie you can do this!”
and let’s not get too excited but I think I have a match made in heaven for the model below sporting the shoe on the runway. *fingers crossed*
these shoes are from christopher “candy” kane’s spring 2010 line. reviews have varied widely. the members of the popular children’s board game candy land all put in their two cents. lord licorice announced publicly that he finds the style ”sickeningly sweet” and will most likely not buy a pair because they don’t come in either red or black. queen frostine replied, “pardon my lord, but we’re not all into the john galliano look. so why don’t you go find jack sparrow and you two can talk to inanimate objects about fashion all night long. the shoes are FAB-ulous.” princess lolly was spotted wearing a pair in pink on the red carpet for the release of the board game’s latest edition. gloppy the molasses monster was asked to use the back entrance as cleaning the carpet is incredibly difficult, but when asked about the shoes he said they were “just fine”. gramma nut feels that these shoes are a health hazard because they are obviously encouraging “the kids” to mouth heels which are most likely coated in bacteria filled soil and bits of feces. she also says she’s no pathologist, but come on.