ooooookay.  so apparently christian louboutin has abandoned his roots and a very successful history of super hot stiletto makery to roll this shit off the presses for fall 2010.

the shoes are so boring they almost don’t exist.  it’s like i’m looking at nothing.

i mean, a shoe in leopard print that has elastic AND a mere two inch heel is complete nonsense.  it’s a man in a dress.  the shoe should by all reason just explode.

nina ricci’s entire spring 2010 line of shoes, seem to have contracted some sort of doily-esque flesh eating disease.  this makes the women who wear them look like they have whatever robin williams had in that movie jack.  30 year old women trapped in the wardrobe of someone, at least four times their age.  i guess it might be hot in some sort of large white panties sort of way.  and also some sort of spaghetti spilled down front of floral dress paired with black brandless sneakers waiting for the bus stop sort of way.  *many short bursts of loud negative buzzer sound*  or maybe one of those ladies who wears victorian period theatre costume rentals like they’re regular clothes.  those bitches gotta stop.  they’re always walking around downtown covered in a mountain of lace never looking ahead always looking around to see who is watching them because they are living in a self starred fantasy world.  at least spaghetti lady keeps her eyes straight ahead and only talks to herself.

spring and summer 2010 is upon us.  and what has chanel brought us – more fall pumps.  like they always do.  yeah we’ll throw some confetti and blow a kazoo.  but we all know what’s coming.  a lot of ornate hardware and way too many fasteners.  every fucking year chanel.  in the photo above, it looks like a tiny parasitic laura bush is attached to the model’s foot.  oh, and i heard if you spend over $10,000 at the chanel store this year they’ll put a complimentary chastity belt on your eldest daughter’s hoo ha that only comes off with the swipe of a black credit card and a good family name.