Archive for the ‘ shoes for sluts ’ Category
maybe this shoemaker hasn’t spoken to many prisoners or slaves. if they had they would know that when you strapped something down forcibly with chains it generally leaves nasty bruises and contusions on the skin. there’s no need to add to the growing pedestric abuse problem in the country. “what? no no. my shoes? (uncomfortable laugh) what do [ READ MORE ]
if i woke up with pink inflamed skin and bumps all over my body i certainly wouldn’t put myself out for sale and charge $1,000. *raises eyebrow to dolce and gabbana* [ READ MORE ]
giuseppe zanotti was arrested this morning for cruelly forcing this shoe to put its finger into a light socket mid-designing it. when police asked zanotti, “what did the shoe ever do to you?” zanotti simply replied, “no comment,” while looking like a really old Italian gay. [ READ MORE ]
this is the first time the Dior line has been cited using what appear to be vaginas staple gunned shut down the forefoot of a shoe. not white chicks are going crazy. [ READ MORE ]
alexander mcqueen pulls out all the stops or something with this sequin covered ultra-platform boot for fall. though standard sizes remain motionless in stockrooms across the world, sizes 13 and up are already on backorder. he is quoted as saying, “i’m british, see?” [ READ MORE ]
good news for total losers. no longer must they fantasize about Lelu from the Fifth Element or 7 of 9 from Star Trek Voyager. once nerds obtain high paying careers, they will be able to buy these shoes for their gold digging girlfriends turning their fantasies into reality. gold digging girlfriends have expressed hesitation about wearing these neck breakers from Nina Ricci’s Fall [ READ MORE ]
this ingenious pairing of zipper and leather by Juicy Couture makes a fucking butterfly. holy shit. so fucking clever. where do the guys at JC come up with this shit? how many ways can you use leather and hardware to spell out, “i’m a slut” on all your merch? inifinity sign comes to mind!!!! i just still can’t believe [ READ MORE ]
the extreme height and fur detailing of this nicholas kirkwood fall 2009 bootie will most likely be viewed as limiting features for most high fashion customers. but there will always be those who embrace eclectic fashion and find a place for it in their lives. for instance, on the icy planet of hoth hans solo cut this shoe open [ READ MORE ]
finally, a shoe for the chubby chaser. strap these on your feet and you’ll have adorably overweight bachelors biting at your ankles in no time. who said the only way to a man’s heart was through his stomach? oh wait. [ READ MORE ]
women must look at this shoe and think of it as a stable investment for their wardrobe portfolio. basic colorway. easy slip-on style. manageable heel. i can hear their comments mid-try on now: “i do wear a lot of brown.” “god charles i really think i could wear these.” if footwear is a financial investment – then these shoes would be the equivalent [ READ MORE ]