Archive for the ‘ actually it's fine ’ Category
before i blog about this spring 2010 balmain sandal please excuse me as i grab an acid wash levi’s jacket with faux sheepskin collar. *puts on imaginary whack-jack* ah, that’s better. this is just a repackaged teva isn’t it balmain? whatever it is, it makes me want to rent Sister Act and listen to Nirvana on [ READ MORE ]
i’m in a particularly good mood today. so instead of posting totally ugly shoes and clowning them, i am posting the music video “shoes” by kelly and a few pairs of shoes that make me want to sing along. although these shoes are all far more than 300 fucking dollars. want. le sigh. burberry prorsum. fall [ READ MORE ]
almost there sweetheart. and by sweetheart of course i mean dirty lazy bitch. i say, if you’re not going to muster up the ingenuity to invent a quicker and easier shoe fastener then you best fall in line and get to bucklin’. you’re not above it. no one is. although i do enjoy the imagery of [ READ MORE ]
finally a solution for those who want to hide the ankles that low fat milk has cursed them with. waa waaaaa waaaaaaaaaa. [ READ MORE ]
[john, paul and jesus are hanging out in the kitchen of their humble abode] [john] hey jesus how are things going with adina, that cute little water bearer? [jesus] oh her? i haven’t talked to her in a while. i never really talked to her actually. [john] you should. she just broke up with that soldier. you can’t [ READ MORE ]
mc escher decides to make a shoe. which way does it go? wary be the shoe salesperson trying to put this back in the box. it would be like, straight to the 70s with that person’s mind. if you cross your eyes and put your face very close to the computer screen while looking at [ READ MORE ]
balenciaga, who has slowly been profiting from attention deficit hyperactivity disorder since 1937, now openly refuses to acknowledge the validity of the disease. they are claiming their designers are cognizant adults able to make their own decisions in a reasonable amount of time, even if those decisions take months and include combining snowboard parts and more colors than are in [ READ MORE ]
“i’m just not sure those shoes are going to change the fact that gerald doesn’t ever want to have children josephine. i’m just not sure those shoes are the answer. or any sort of medicine for that matter.” “he’ll come around.” “no. he won’t. and i think that’s why you’re having anxiety about this marriage.” “what anxiety?” “josephine. the [ READ MORE ]
say hello to the last pair of shoes you’ll ever have to buy that little brat. i’d like to get a tub of popcorn and a two way mirror and watch that little ingrate just try and get out of this foot straight jacket. you won’t even have to replace them for a bigger size as he gets older, because [ READ MORE ]
this shoe doesn’t care what you think of it. so beware before you sass this shoe about its three tongues because imagine the raspberry it could blow on you. you’d smell like spit afterwards that’s for sure. but if you insist on saying something smart-alecky to it, the silver lining is that it can’t actually talk back. i [ READ MORE ]