yeah this might be okay if it was firmly fastened to the end of a hobo’s stick.  and that hobo was on a refrigerated boxcar on a train headed north.

velcro miu miu?  really?  these shoes look like spies that are wearing all of their disguises at once.  and they look a fool doing it.  a fool i tell you!

god i just can’t get over that velcro.  did miuccia prada just shrug her shoulders and go, “well, it’s not prada now is it?”  or maybe, “hey listen guys i really need to get to the grocery store and buy a cartload of salami and prosciutto to power my italian-ness, could you guys just *wave the hands* velcro those or something?  great thanks.”

*points a single index finger in the air*  “christian-”  *fist to mouth*  “christian i just-”

the sock is a failed attempt to try and keep that rogue toe/the toe bandit in line.  and god knows i hate a tiny bow.  they look chinsy and stupid.  they are in no way proportionate to a human body and are therefore unable to accent one.  how could they?  they’re so small.  i don’t know why people allow manufacturers to get away with this cheap malnourished embellishment over and over again.  it’s insulting.  i would rather have nothing.  i would rather go embellishment hungry.  examine the tiny bow photos below and see for yourself.  and please, if you or anyone you know is wearing shoes that have extremely tiny bows, get help removing them.