snarky portland blogger clowns world. mostly shoes.

i learned about these from an article posted to my facebook.  these so called pants that resemble jeans have no seams and are made of a mixture of cotton and spandex.  the very first line of the article states, “it’s a fashion must have”.  anything only available online or by phone for $39.95 is neither a fashion item nor a necessity.  so, what’s wrong with wearing jeans?  this seems like an awfully elaborate way around the not problem of just wearing jeans.  in the article, a woman named sherrie graddic apparently thinks it would be acceptable to, “drink some wine or watch a movie” in them.  what?  maybe two buck chuck and tremors.  there is no fucking way your ass doesn’t look like a sad clown when you’re walking down the street in these.  there’s no way the pockets are going to maintain any sort of shape.  not to mention the asstrap.  they’ll become droopy and distorted within hours.  your figure will melt like a salvador dali painting.  you know what?  fuck these pants.

(article suggestion by katy tahirih linhart)